It’s the rare Birthday Parlay! That means I can’t be wrong, right?
Did Mayweather REALLY believe he was going to fight Tenshin in front of a bunch of affluent magnates behind closed doors?
I wouldn’t bet on that, but I will bet on some fights!
Parlay Friday is here, and if you’re new then welcome! First, I’ll give you some background on what happened with my last recommendations, then we’ll go over some boring disclaimer my editor makes me put in the article, and lastly, I’ll give you the secret to how I lose money on a weekly basis. Let’s begin!
UFC 230 Recap:
Shortly before the start of the UFC 230 card, Brian Kelleher ended up pulling out due to illness meaning my parlay of him, Ronaldo Souza and Adam Wieczorek was null and void. This ended up being a blessing in disguise as the card was riddled with upsets, and while “Jacare” came through with a late knockout of Chris Weidman, Adam Wieczorek fell victim to a unanimous decision loss at the hands of Marcos Rodrigo De Lima. Considering De Lima weighed in at 253.2 lbs., it looks like heavyweight is his natural weight class after all.
Hopefully, I actually get to bet this time but first, the legalese.
Rules Reminder and Disclaimer
Once again, here is the disclaimer that spells out you shouldn’t take my word as anything close to gospel, and should probably tell me in the comments what I’m doing wrong:
THIS ARTICLE IS FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY, MOSTLY THE ENTERTAINMENT OF YOU LAUGHING AT MY LOST MONEY AS THIS SERIES CONTINUES. I AM NOT QUALIFIED TO GIVE ANY BETTING ADVICE WHATSOEVER, SO PLACE BETS AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Since that’s out of the way, here are the rules:
- All bets must be parlays of 3 or more fights
- All bets must be at least $5 and not exceed $20
- All payouts must be at least 5x the original investment (i.e. $5 bet means a payout of $25, etc.)
Got it? Good. Let’s make some UFC 25th Anniversary picks.
UFC Denver Parlay Bets
The Picks
Ashley Yoder (-160)
The “Spider Monkey” has had a rough go of it in the UFC, going 0-3 in her tenure with the organization. While she has faced some stiff competition and should have arguably won her last fight against Mackenzie Dern, it’s a make or break moment for Yoder as another loss will almost certainly result in her getting cut from the organization.
Amanda Cooper has also floundered during her run with the promotion, alternating wins and losses since she fell victim to Tatiana Suarez’s deadly wrestling pedigree in her UFC debut. “ABC” has two unanimous decision wins over Angela Magana and Anna Elmose, both of whom are no longer with the company, and all of her losses have come by way of first-round submission.
It’s no secret that Cooper’s biggest weakness is her ground game, and Yoder’s nickname is “Spider Monkey” for a reason. With an abysmal 20% career takedown defense, Cooper’s only hope is to keep the bout standing or a quick finish, both of which will be incredibly hard to do. Yoder should easily take this by submission or at the very least a unanimous decision.
Donald Cerrone (+175)
Continuing with the theme of struggling fighters, Donald “Cowboy” Cerrone makes his way back home to face off against gym nemesis Mike “Platinum” Perry. Going 1-4 in his last five bouts, “Cowboy” has been unable to replicate the same success he found at lightweight since moving up to 170lbs., though he’s kept most of his losses competitive sans the Jorge Masvidal knockout and Darren Till fiasco. If Cerrone can finish Perry, he’ll hold the all-time record for most finishes in the UFC.
“The Platinum One” is looking to build off his split decision win over Paul Felder at UFC 226, enlisting the help of Cerrone’s former camp Jackson-Wink and causing a schism within the MMA team. 3-3 in his last six, Perry showed some improved tactics in his outing with the “Irish Dragon” and a win over Cerrone would likely give him a spot in the official UFC rankings.
This is the riskiest bet in the parlay by far, as Perry has one-punch knockout power and Cerrone is more than hittable, but whether or not Cowboy will be successful comes down to his patience and Platinum’s improvement. Cowboy has already revealed he plans to take this fight to the ground, and if he stays on the outside of Perry’s boxing range and sticks to that plan he should be able to fend off his somewhat one-dimensional opponent. If, however, Perry follows a smart strategy devised by Cerrone’s former coaches and adds some layers to his game, it could be a rough night for the former lightweight contender. All that being said, I think Perry will be constantly looking for the big knockout and Cowboy will exploit that to get the victory.
Chan Sung Jung (-140)
It’s been almost two years since the “Korean Zombie” has fought in the octagon, but that’s not too shabby considering the 1,281 days in between his last two appearances. Coming off a first-round knockout of Dennis Bermudez, Chan Sung Jung takes on late replacement Yair Rodriguez in the main event as he tries to put together an argument for another crack at the 145lbs. belt.
Rodriguez steps back into the cage after a year and a half layoff, somehow losing his job and being rehired during that time span. “El Pantera” is attempting to get back into the win column after a vicious beating by Frankie Edgar at UFC 211, the man he’s filling in for on short notice to fight Jung, and while it’s a particularly tough fight to take without a full camp, Rodriguez may have been handed his walking papers yet again if he had declined.
These odds surprise me to be honest, as Jung looked as sharp as ever in his return last year and there’s no telling how much the Edgar beatdown affected Yair’s confidence. That doesn’t mean it will be a walk in the park for the Korean Zombie though, especially if Rodriguez’s time off has allowed the featherweight prospect to sharpen the tools in his already impressive striking repertoire. Either way this should be a fun fight to watch, but Jung’s ground game and incredible durability should give him the win here.
What’s on the line
Since Parlay Friday falls on my birthday today, I’m going all out with a max $20 bet for $105
Money Spent: $20
Payout: $0
Total Net Gain/Loss: -$20
Think you have better picks than mine? Wanna help a guy out? Leave a comment below and let me know!
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